Michele Corgiat
marriage and family therapist
Paper-doll Existence
by Michele Corgiat on September 19th, 2015

Riding in a school bus and peering out the window as we passed green fields, almond orchards, and dairy farms that had become so familiar during this daily trek to the 1st grade,   I found myself transported in my imagination to another world.  A world where this bus was my touring bus and the other students, my entourage.  I was adored by my fans and those who found me to be somebody special.  Perhaps a singer or an actor.   Somebody loved and respected.  Somebody who’s presence was sought after.  How many times in our life have we desired to be sought after.  Beginning when we are small children and throughout our adult lives, we have an innate desire to be connected with others and pursued by other.  The question that I continue to ponder is,  what price will we pay to have others desire our company.  Will we sacrifice ourselves to be loved?  Will we become somebody that God did not intend for us in order to feel connected with others.  Will I hide and ignore my true identity by “putting on” a facade to be accepted?
Picture a paper doll with all of her cut out clothing.  There are so many different outfits to choose from.  Some for formal occasions and others for casual affairs.  The facades that we put on in each role we play is like one of those outfits.  However, in the case of our personal paper doll existence, we carefully design each “outfit” to meet the expectations and roles that we grow to believe will be accepted by others.  Sometimes, these outfits include parts of who we really are, while other parts are pretty and well designed to hide the parts of ourselves that we believe are shameful and unacceptable.  Other outfits are created to protect us from being too vulnerable so that we do not feel ashamed while also hoping to attract others to want to connect and find us special.  
Here is my challenge for each of us.  Take off the facade!  God created you and desires you, in your vulnerable state.  He doesn't want you to pretend to be somebody you are not.  Stop buying into the lie that you have to fit a certain mold to be accepted.  
I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.
Wonderful are your works;
    my soul knows it very well.
Psalm 139:14

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